Shaken, Not Stirred

Several things... Since the dawn of last week Wednesday, a new paranoia has settled within me at the sacrifice of both my wallet and my driving record. One more thing to add to that before I change the subject: I have never hated winter. The beauty of pure white fluff falling from the sky in various forms have always been the 'Icing on the cake' so-to-speak when placed against terrible roads and bitter, bone-chilling windchills. Until now. Last week Wednesday, for the first ever in my life I could understand why people say, 'I hate winter' because I too, for a brief moment in time (its over now) hated winter with everything that is in me. It was a cold, sad, tear-filled, winter day...last week Wednesday.

Enough of the drama.

*Sigh* My "perfect" planning fell apart today. I was...am, I am...planning on a Project Serve trip with a couple girls I work with and my co-leader (I'm required to have one) bailed.

*Sigh*

Yesterday's weight: 220
Pounds to go: 50
Yesterday's menu: a few small chuncks of fried bacon (and I do mean a few...like 5), low-fat, homemade beef stew, corn and beans, a bagel, a diet coke, orange juice, curry for dinner.
Workout: Four days last week but Monday's consisted of 30 min eliptical, weight lifiting for triceps, bicepts, back muscles (lower and upper), and abs.
Total time: 50 minutes.

I felt like I was on top of it all and was managing everything (finally). And as the day went on, I lost grip on a few things without doing anything. I don't know what happened. I have no clue why my co-leader bailed (tho I do still have to call her back...which I'll do tomorrow because I'm going to seek guidance for the conversation I would like to have with her). That right now, is my main priority: Project Serve and getting it all together. I would just like it to go right and if you're reading this, whether you believe in God or not, I need you to pray.

Shaken is always better. Because when things go aray, its better to start from scratch than have things lingering from a method that doesn't work. I'm shaken, not stirred...the Martini of my life is better that way.